uniforms?

Just realized that i'm constantly sewing, have costumed two plays, so why can't I tailor my own school uniforms???

Am kicking myself over the head for not realizing that three months ago.  =P

rain+pavement

So, thanks to taylor swift, pretty much every teenage girl's dream is to dance with that one guy in the parking lot after it has rained...

just a musing.  But a pretty one.  <3

christianity and what we do about it

Or rather, what we don't do about it.

As you probably already know, I occationally wax theological on here. 

You're also probably familiar with the fact that I go to a Christian school. 

However.

Just because it's a Christian school doesn't mean that every single kid there is a Christian like I am. 

It doesn't mean that at all.

I have friends who aren't Christians.  I have enemies that aren't Christians.  I simply just know of kids who aren't Christians. 

So we're all in chapel (ever wednesday after first period, if you were wondering) and singing "Mighty to Save."

And we sing the chorus:


Saviour, He can move the mountains,

My God is Mighty to save,

He is Mighty to save

....and then I'm suddenly aware that tears are streaming down my face and ruining my makeup.  In school.  Joy.  But tears because there's people---friends, classmates, the kid I'm kinda scared of---and they're not saved and really, to be frank, where would they be going if they died tomorrow? 

Yeah, morbidity, but trying to prove a point here. 

And thinking now, it's not just those three or four people.  It's millions around the world---there may be three going through my mind, but there's so many. 

But back to the few that I'm crying about.  Why am I just crying and ruining my makeup in the audatorium at school at things the guys on stage---no less the same stage I'm going to be taking measurements on in musical theatre class four hours later on---and not DOING something?! 

I mean, sure, I've *tried* to bring it up a little with my friends who aren't Christians, but I only came to this school three months ago, and really, people you're barely just friends with aren't the people you can start preaching to.  I'd be like shoving asparagus down the mouth of someone who hasn't really ever tried asparagus and isn't really brave enough to try asparagus yet. 

I mean, you could always put sugar on the asparagus, but then it's sugared asparagus, and doesn't that sound even worse than just asparagus. 

You can't really sugar-coat Christianity either. 

But seriously, what'shoulda girl like me do?!  I mean, I have trouble talking about almost anything, let alone Christianity.  I mean, that's a big deal.  I don't want to mess it up. 

But in basic fact: I'm just... I don't have a word for it.  Asparagus, maybe.  I dunno.  What I'm trying to say is that I haven't really done anything that I know I should do because I'm scared.  Scared that I won't get Christianity to my friend in a way that will make sense to her.  Scared...well just SCARED of another kid who I know needs Christ.  And then scared of asking another Christian friend to help me tell this kid I'm scared of because of STUPID HOMECOMING DRAMA. 

STUPID HOMECOMING DRAMA.  I mean, how lame is that?!  Being a wuss about spreading the gospel because of HOMECOMING DRAMA.  I really need to rethink my priorities. 

And another thing is not wanting to sound conceited and stuff, like: "my religion is better than yours so I'm going to shove it down your throat and make you believe it..."

Of course, there's a few more important factors that I'm not going to address here, cuz this is the INTERNET, people, and who knows how many kids from school are reading this due to a few obscure links on facebook + way too much time on their hands to mess around on the computer.

Facebook + too much time.  You can find just about anything about just about anyone with that deadly combo.

But I digress. 

Please pray---for these kids, but even more for me and the other Christian kids on campus.  I say for the rest of us because really, we can't just JUST pray for our unsaved classmates---that's asking God for something and then going "yeah have fun doing that God cya later i'ma gonna go do my own thing now."  Pray most that we'll be able to reach out.  Especially me---that I'll stop being scared to talk to my Christian classmates about this rising issue--and especially that I won't CRY while asking them.  Because that's how this effects me.  (one guess who's nearly crying right now?)  So we'll be able to reach out together as a Christian community to those who haven't come to know the Lord personally. 

Because really, we have no excuses. 

the boy who lived

HARRY POTTER!!!

Coming out friday people. 

my real impressions of mockinjay (MAJOR SPOILERS!)

Okay, so I've posted before on what I thought of Mockingjay, but here's the very real, funnier version of my thoughts (because this is how my brain works)

Katniss: "AH there's a possibility that Gale helped make the bomb that killed Prim so I don't like him anymore, even if he didn't plan for her destruction at all!"

Katniss: "AH Gale's snogged other girls before he got to know me, so he's disloyal and I don't like him anymore!"


Katniss: "Huh.  Can't have Gale because of aforesaid reasons..." *Peeta walks by* Katniss: "AH!  PEETA I CHOOSE YOU!"  (said along the lines of "Pikachu I choose you!")


Katniss: "Peeta are I are good together, and we don't foresee any problems in our relationship because we're both mentally unstable, and that's a similarity that will make us get along, especially since Peeta has tried to kill me on multiple occasions and doesn't know truth from fantasy."

Gale to Peeta: "Have you noticed that she basically snogs us whenever she feels sorry for us or thinks we need a ego boost?"  Peeta: "Yeah, it's getting really annoying.  Apparently, snogging us just has nothing to do with her romantically liking us anymore.  She's kinda scaring me."

Katniss: "I'm super-smart and can understand most anything Gale or Peeta says UNTIL Gale wants me to shoot him when he's caught by the Capitol and then I don't understand his obvious signals at all."

Peeta: "Katniss I love you!  Katniss I hate you!  Katniss I love you!  Katniss I hate you!"

Tigris: "I'm just here to illustrate the horrific versions of plastic surgery and tattooing that the Capitol's people inflict on themselves.  And dude, fur leggings.  They're epic."

Haymitch: "So anyone wanna inform me if I'm good or evil?"

Finnick: *dead*

Katniss: "For taking no interest in clothes, I sure describe them a lot."


Epilogue: "Dude, I sound soooooooooo Harry Potter."

 Gale: "So much for my happy ending.  I'm off with a undetermined fancy job and am snogging fictional girls of Katniss' imagination off in District 2."

-----

so yeah, you probably figured out that I wrote this right after Mockingjay came out.  I'll maintain that these are still my views on the the book, and that this rather sarcastic and slightly rude post is only being posted because I'm simply scrambling to keep a coherent mind as the first quarter of school ended.  Ah!

=)

quote I found:

"There are three guys in a girl's life:
The one she loves,
The one she hates,
and the one she can't live without.
And in the end,
they're all the same guy."

So true.  Someday, I'll expand on why.  (Add that to the list of thing I've promised to write on)

Of course, they're other guys too, but there's always that one.  Who of course at age sixteen I haven't found yet. 

But hey!  I've always got my brother's arm to walk into homecoming dance on.

No, really. 

costuming again

Figured out the costume situation, but keeping everything under wraps for now.

I will say that I think that I'm slightly insane, and the costume inspiration is Frankenstien/Raggedy Ann/1870s fashion/ballet. 

Yes, that is the level of insane I am.

I think I need more tulle. 

jk, jk. 

it's that time of year

...you know last year's saga on this. 

Halloween. 

Well, October has rolled around again, and I find myself digging through old boxes of costumes and cartons of fabric and ribbon and realizing I don't know what to wear.  Obviously, I won't be picking up some costume at Costume City or something.  Way too tacky.  I'm making it myself.

So the brain is churning as to exactly what I should wear.  It's not like I can't dress up---casey not dressing up?  That's a reversal of terms.  It just isn't done.  So I started thinking of what, and I had all these ideas:

 

Hermione Granger.  

The Pros:

I could totally pull it off.  I'm definitely not as teeny as Emma Watson, but I'm pretty small.  And my hair has more red tones, but it's similar enough, especially since halloween = night light, not daylight.  

The Cons:

Who hasn't been Hermione Granger?  The major con is that I'd have to have a group to go with, because Hermione alone?  Lame.  And who on earth would I convince to go as Harry, Ron, and Draco?  And another little con is that those Hogwarts uniforms?  I wear almost the same thing every day of my life.  I mean, school uniforms!  Kneesocks and skirts, anyone? 

 Alice.  In Wonderland, of course.  

The Pros:

The costume is cute, and I wouldn't have to wear heels.  

The Cons:

This should be obvious.  EVERYONE is going to be Alice this year---it's more in that in.  It's all from the movie, of course, and I just don't want to look like everyone else---people who know me will testify to the fact that I stand out from the crowd---I'm a person who should be different.  

Ginny Weasley.

The Pros:

C'mon, she's Ginny!  As with Hermione, I could definitely pull it off, maybe with a little temporary red hair dye.  The costume would be no-sewing for me, too, and that's a good thing, with my pretty-busy school schedule.  I have about 15 hours over the next month to get my whole costume together, give or take a few hours.  

The Cons:

Ginny in the books is TINY.  The actress may be tall, but Ginny isn't.  I'm 5'9!  And at least 1,000 people around me are going to do this costume.  I'd have to have the best Ginny costume or I'd feel sub-par.  And as with Hermione, I'd have to have a group or it'd be lame.  

As if that wasn't enough, I'll just throw some more of my criteria on you:

No heels or long skirts.  This may sound crazy, but the cross country finals are the NEXT DAY (!!!!!), so if I injure myself on halloween; I'll be out of the races.  And that will not only hurt me, but my whole team. When you're the only girl who runs Varsity, your times and participation are crucial.  I can't trip on halloween and ruin things for my XC team.  So obviously, whatever I wear has to have a short skirt and flat shoes.  

Stripey tights.  Whenever a girl has the chance, she should wear stripey tights.  It doesn't even matter what color.  I totally need to wear stripey tights.  That's be awesome.

 Skirts.  Okay, I know I said that I couldn't wear long skirts because of the trip-factor, but what girl wants to wear pants on halloween?  A skirt will be the thing to do, of course!  A dress would be even better.  

So now I'm totally clueless.  I have maybe 15 hours to get all my materials and make my costume, and I still have no idea what to make.  I have to do SOMETHING.  

But what? 

Thoughts on Twelfth Grade Kills

Okay, I don't even think it's necessary to post a spoiler warning, because c'mon, you KNOW there will be spoilers!  But...

*MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD*

First and most obviously, the "Is Vlad going to choose Snow or Meredith?" argument.

Well, it was Snow.  Oh, big surprise.  I WAS a Team Meredith, but in book five, Meredith sort of got...whatever a girl version of a jerk would be.  She was always mysterious, but there was no mystery at all---she was just shallow.  I don't see what Joss saw in her, but hey, they like eachother?  Yays for them. 

When Snow entered the story, she seemed to be too perfect, and just a tool for the makings of the 'love triangle' that all cool books are flaunting this season.  But in book five---she became a real person.  Especially since she and Vlad's frosting fight---seriously, one of my favorite literary scenes ever.  ("If Nelly finds out, you are dead.")

So while Meredith proved herself shallow, Snow proved herself to really have something to her. 


Second, the deaths.  I understand that D'Ablo needed to leave the story quickly, and that was an excellent opener for several reasons: 

• First, that he just needed to leave the story.
• Second, that a opener that was shocking was needed.
• Thirdly and most importantly, it provided a opening for the book that wasn't Vlad confronting his dad---that would have been very awkward, for the reasons that new readers might not get what was happening, and it would be pretty anticlimactic to open the book with an explanation of what was happening.

With the other deaths.... Nelly.  I never would have imagined that she would be one to die---she seemed so firmly a part of the series that it was wowing.  Very sad for Otis, though.

Like Dumbledore, Nelly will live on in our hearts.

Also, Snow's "death."  It didn't convince me.  Realistically, knowing Vlad, he should have been ON THE FLOOR next to her body bawling, and not being able to get up, maybe even going into shock.  He was far to composed.  But I am glad she isn't dead.

Tomas.  This isn't exactly his death, but his whole part in the book was awkward and it didn't totally agree with the earlier books.  And who got burned up with Mellina?  Maybe I just didn't read well enough?

Also, is Vlad going to age and eventually die when Snow doesn't?  That would seriously break Snow's heart.  Or is it that his Pravus powers make it that he doesn't age?  I wish I knew...

One more thing:

HenryxOctober=cutest thing ever!  Awwww! 

so you get this

...I got a three-day weekend from school, so I really quickly colored this picture of HL.  I'm aware that there's too much purple in his hair, but it was a total speedpaint.  

He has pretty eyes, yes?

hey look, school started but i'm still posting something!

...but it's going to be really short.

So, have you ever noticed that all the real famous 'teen heartbeats' or whatever all have THESE initials?!

JB

 I mean, look at it, it's more uncanny that the fact that Taylor Swift always seems to be dating the current mega "teen heartbeat:" (what?  That's true too!)

The Jonas Brothers (okay, they aren't as popular as they used to be, but bear with me)

Jacob Black (rawr wolfie)

Justin Bieber (uh, nothing to say here.)


I mean, seriously.  If I just renamed Peter something that had the initials JB, suddenly my book would be super-popular.  Especially if I added in some werewolves and vampires.  Or maybe vampwolves.  But seriously, ugh.

But then, I did get another suggestion for what I should rename Peter:

Justin Jonas.

I mean, Peter's name is already totally overrated for a teen fantasy fiction, but I think I prefer "Peter" to "Josh Blackthorne" or something. 

Remind me to post about Justin Bieber sometime.  And before you ask, I do NOT have "Bieber Fever" or whatever.  I mean, that doesn't even rhyme!

sketchdump

 

So hey.  School starts tomorrow, so I'm going to say here and now, don't expect a boatload of posts.  I mean, I hate it when people say that, but it's true, it's just not summer anymore and I just won't have as much time.  So here's something to keep you mildly busy: a small sampling of the stuff I've sketched recently.  This is by no means everything, but just a bit of it.  After all, some of what I do has spoilers for my book and such.  

 

These two are from when I attempted to manga-ize a scene in my book.  It fell through, but hey, HL turned out looking pretty good.  Or, at least better than that atrocity that was my colored painting...  

Some random vampire boy.  I was going to shade his hair in, but he looked so pretty that I figured, why mess with perfection?  He's part of my practice in drawing boys---I can draw girls, but not boys.  I'm trying to get better.  

   

Yes, I know Peter's name is hard to read.  That's because you aren't really supposed to know what his last name is, yet.  Not that it's important or anything, I just don't want to give away too much about the book yet.  So, if you can read it, great, if you can't, I'm not explaining, sorry!   

There's lots of things going on in this drawing that quite frankly would be spoilers for the whole series if I told you what they are. You can try to figure them out yourself, though.

  

Close-up.  I love all five of these guys so much it hurts.  They're just like that.  It's funny how fictional characters can mess with a person's head, huh?  

  

Yes, HL lying on the grass again.  Note the same drawings as the one above, though.

  

Haha, Matty and Peter.  The only thing really going here is that I learned that I like all the dangly bandages.  Must draw those again sometime.

  

I dunno exactly what HL's doing with his hand, and you might be able to recognize the girl (my brother could, at least...)

  

And again, HL, on some small, very grainy paper.  It feels much different to draw on a rough paper as opposed to a smooth one.  This is what I get for not checking my paper when I was still in the store.  I decided to keep with the notebook though, because I should learn how to draw on different surfaces.  

 

Also, a practice in perspective, which quite frankly I'm hoooorible at.  I've never really taken a class for stuff like that, so I'm teaching myself.  It's kind of interesting, but I don't always get great results.  (read: never.) 

So in review, lotsa sketches, leaving for school and maybe less posts.  

happier stuff

...cuz that previous post was really depressing.

Also: I know this isn't my best work.  I did it in like eight straight hours and just got bored.  So basically, Peter looks good and everyone else looks a little flat.  I think it's because Peter has a darker skin tone than anyone else, so his shading looks way more noticeable:

HL's skin has just as many tones as anyone else's, but his skin is so pale that you can just barely see his shading: (ignore Leah and Lex, who both look pretty flat)

A few words on what HL looks like right now.  You're probably wondering "what happened?!?" 

Uh, that's a pretty good question.  We know all about HL, of course, and you're going... but casey, he looks ugly and NOTHING like HL! 

Yeaaaaah.  I know all about that, and I can tell you with absolute truth that he has NOT become all weird-looking in the actual draft---it's just my picture.  I'm experimenting with new styles for Goth Elf Boy, and this was one that didn't make it. 

The obvious is he looks too tired, too big cheeks, and just not old enough.  Less obvious is that his hair is coming down weird with a really unflattering cut, and he's not jazzed out enough for his character. 


On second thought, though, nobody really made it in this drawing:

I mean, if we go from right to left, Peter's looking annoyed (but that was on purpose) and there's a bit too much glow on his cheeks, Matt's looking younger, Leah looks not entirely there (and we all know that's my job to be out there, not hers), we've already gone over that HL looks weird, and Lex is really the only one who turned out halfway like herself, but her lineart and coloring are bad.

Luckily, I do have sketches of what they SHOULD look like, and Peter's shirt turned out awesome.


 Lots of GIMP practice, yes? 

thoughts on mockingjay

SPOILERS.

and if you didn't get that the first time, SPOILERS again.

Okay, in case you haven't read it, we'll start with something general in case you're still reading even after there were two spoiler warnings:

I sort of noticed that the story deteriorated as it went along.  Not as in this book, but the series.  The Hunger Games was incredibly strong, but Catching Fire was weaker, as well as Mockingjay.  I personally think that's because the author could not have all the time she needed to write three novels of the caliber of The Hunger Games, and she did amazingly well for having only a year between books. 

Like with Catching Fire, Mockingjay was confusing at times.  I guess what we all wanted to happen happened---no more Capitol, and no more Hunger Games. 

This was the first book when I realized just how dangerous Katniss was---from wanting a Capitol-children Hunger Games to shooting President Coin, she was frightening.  In some ways, she was much, much madder than Peeta, who was hallucinating for half the book.

While we're on the topic of Peeta, he plays damsel in distress far too often, I thought, wouldn't Katniss get bored of him? 

Uh, I was slightly 'Team Gale' as I read this, and am a little bitter, not that he didn't end up with Katniss, but because his story had no conclusion beyond Katniss supposing that he's off snogging someone else in District Two.  Really, Katniss?

I'm also confused about Gale setting off some bomb somewhere or something? 

Anyway, Katniss, Gale, and Peeta, but especially Katniss and Peeta, sort of lost personality during this final installment.  It was mostly because they both went unpredictable and mad, which is completely understandable in their horrific conditions, but it made things a little annoying for the reader.  We saw a lot more of Gale in this book than in the two previous, but he's become generic too---he's lost some of his cocky attitude, and has become slightly "Peeta---book 1" in personality. 

My only frustration with this is that I wanted to know the characters so much better, and after three books, I'm still not sure what exactly they are like, despite the strong ideas presented.  It's very confusing.

I'm not trying to totally slam the book, of course, I'm just confused!   

warning---this is really depressing

Don't say I didn't warn you.  You know, next time I even THINK about illustrating a scene like this, someone needs to hit me hard in the head.  It was going along swimmingly until I decided to tear up Matt's eyes, whereinthen I wanted to curl up in a corner and cry for a few hours. 

My writings affects me waaaaaaaaay too much. 

changes yes/no (second choice invalid!)

Okay, so it's all about changing right now.  I'm sixteen, getting my driver's license, going to Real School (tm) for the First Time Ever, being the only girl on an all-guys cross country team, all that. 

So, with all that, I'm probably going to change my blog's URL shortly, just because it's SO HARD TO FIND. 

Seriously, what was I thinking?  In FRENCH?  I mean, I'm taking spanish, not FRENCH. 

Yo esta loca. 

So it'll change pretty soon, and if that messes up the people who are following this thing, I'm really sorry! 

But just like with all those other changes, it hasn't happened just quite yet. 

GIMP practice

further thoughts on digitally coloring manga, including what might be an answer

You probably remember yesterday's post on the problems I was having digitally coloring my artwork.

I think I've solved it, with a little help.


So in case anybody else who's trying to digitally color with GIMP runs across my blog, let's go through what exactly I did wrong, and how we can fix it:

Note before we start: aren't you glad I chose a character pretty enough that we won't be sick of him yet?

1.  Okay, so my first, and greatest problem was the size of file I was trying to work with.  I was using a tiny 800x600 file, and it was too grainy to draw with to start.  I tried a much larger 2112x2816 file, and it worked so much better.  (I didn't take any photographic evidence, but trust me, it was great.)

2.  Second, I was using a 'paintbrush' application when I should have been using a pressure-sensitive 'ink' application to draw my lines.  In the drawing above, I have almost no variety in line weight.  

3.  As I said in my last post, my line weights were too thick.  This was a huge part of my problem, though not as much as the tiny file size.

4.  Also as said in my previous post, the skin shading was too detailed for the heavy line weight and the chunky hairstyle.  

Now that we've got that list over with, more on the hairstyle, while it is undeniably too chunky for the skin-shading style, it isn't as bad as I thought it was---it's just that awful thick line weight that I was forced to do because of my tiny file size!  

So really, long story short, I totally used a too-small file, and that caused most of my problems, as my dad pointed out to me.  

Incidentally, I should have been able to figure that out ages ago, because of an incident where my mom and aunt were going crazy trying to find a large-file size photo of our family all together. 

The good that came out of it was that I learned so so so much stuff along the way, which I wouldn't have found so soon if I had used a large file size from the beginning.

And didn't you just love meeting another character? 

thoughts on digitally coloring manga

Remember this guy? 

I decided to give him a little color in GIMP.

Big mistake.

Important note: this is not a finished drawing!  

Concentrate on his skin for a minute.  It looks okay, right?  A little choppy, but generally all right.  

Now look at his hair.  If you just look at it, it seems okay.  

Now look at the whole drawing.  The skin and hair just don't work together!  

At first I thought that his hair just wasn't detailed enough to match with his somewhat-realistic skin, but looking at him again, I think it's my line weight.  

I'm not saying that the non-detailed hair isn't part of it, but the heavy line weight, while fine in the original drawing, which had very little shading or detail:

Just doesn't work in a drawing with lots of realistic detail:

Also, all the lines for interior detail (excluding his nose, which I did in a lighter line weight) looked a bit heavy, awkward, from his eyebrows to his mouth to his collarbone, though the hair is by far the worst.  I think this is because regular, human, hair is very light compared to the sharp contrast displayed by, say, jawbone to neck:

See how light the 'outline' of my hair is in contrast to that of the shadow cast by my jawline against my neck?  My angel boy has lines just as heavy for his hairline as for his jawline, and the result is that he just looks awkward.  His lines are even a bit thick around his shoulders and the jawline itself.

Uh, I think I need to reduce my line weight?

However, I don't think line weight is the only culprit, as I briefly mentioned before, I was thinking that his hair wasn't detailed enough for his skin, and that might be adding to my problem. 

Notice how choppy and non-strandy his hair is:

Then compare it to this picture of Renton from Eureka Seven:

Well, Renton's hair is just as choppy as my angel boy's, but it looks fine on Renton.  

What's up?

Okay, notice how Renton and Eureka are shaded: cell shading, while my angel boy is all soft shading.  I'm thinking that the choppy, undetailed hair can't go with soft shading; it has to go with hard cell shading if you want it to go at all.  So if I had cell shaded my angel boy instead of soft shading him, he wouldn't have looked so strange.  

I still would have had to reduce my line weight, as shown by Renton and Eureka: even though they're cell shaded, their lines are not that heavy, like my angel boy's are.  

Which brings me to YET ANOTHER POINT:

I use GIMP to color in my artwork.  (I say the word 'use' lightly, as I'm just beginning to dabble in digitally coloring my artwork, as opposed to watercolor.  This probably comes from the fact that I've switched to manga as my art style.)

Anyway, the point is that I don't know how to get smooth, even lines in any program, which is why I'm making them so thick, because they will be more even that way.  

In Paint.net and GIMP, which are the two programs I've used so far, the fine lines are pixtel-y and generally choppy and ugly looking:

   

Ew, grainy! Especially note HL's jawline---it's totally choppy, and I have no idea how to fix it short of majorly blurring it, which results in my line art being, well, blurry and wide, which doesn't really solve the problem.

So what do I need to do?  Get Photoshop?  Does that do fine, non-pixtel-y lines?  Or do I need to do something like make huge, huge files which will be so enormous that you can't see the grainy lines when the file is being viewed at a size lower than full size?  

I don't even know if that's possible without killing my computer/sanity, whichever comes first.  

Should I just grit my teeth and get a good version of Photoshop?

Any input appreciated! 

Thirteen

1. Today is Friday
2. The thirteenth
3.  So I'm doing a 13 list a la Emily the Strange
4.  Who, by the way, is totally awesome, like Hello Kitty for junior highers or something
5.  Especially in her YA book series
6. Speaking of literature, I can't stand fanfiction but I love fanart
7. Something must be wrong with me
8. Further testimony to this fact is that I love getting vocabulary in school since it gives me words to use in my novel---really good ones
9. Which is going pretty well, by the way
10. Though draft six will not be done this summer because school starts in TWO WEEKS
11.  Eeeeeeps!
12.  So scary!
13.  Wish me luck, because Emily sure won't be: